Church Family!
I am so excited about this first issue of Truth for Transformation! I hope that this new way of communicating will indeed give us all more truth that can transform us more into the image of Jesus!
What can you expect in each issue?
Updates from each ministry
Opportunities to engage and serve
Prayer requests
Upcoming event information
Highlights from what’s happening at JBC
In my column, I will be suggesting good resources along with personal book reviews. Also, I’d like to answer a question or concern you might have. This can be a Bible question, family question, or something related to the culture. Email me at ben@jenksbible.org with a question that is on your mind.
This month I’d like to answer a question that I think might be on the mind of a lot of young families in our church.
What are some things I can do to raise a godly family or a biblically based family?
This question is near and dear to my heart as I have just sent my youngest child off to college. Lisa and I have been working at this noble task of raising a family “in the Lord” for 27 years with our five children. Here are some points that come to my mind after almost three decades of child-rearing.
These children of yours belong to God. They are on loan to you to train up in the fear and admonition of the Lord. It is your highest calling. It is worth all the sacrifices you have to make. This includes sacrifices of money, time, and career. It takes a lot of time and energy to raise a family.
You, men, need to bear the heat of the day to provide and protect your family. The Bible says “act like men” and I want to say to the men of JBC, do just that. Let your wife know that you will do whatever it takes to free her up to focus on being a mother and a home keeper. (Titus 2, 1 Timothy 5:14). You are accountable and responsible for your family before God. Does this mean wives can never work? No, I’m not saying that. You will need to figure that puzzle out for your family. What I am saying is that you must take responsibility for your family and seeing that all their needs (physical, spiritual, emotional, educational) are being met. Children are only young once and focus is going to be key in terms of raising them well. Mothers have been uniquely gifted by God to nurture children. Free your wife up to be the one nurturing your children as much as possible. As the man of your home, you also need to do what it takes to free your wife up to be the “home despot” or “home manager.” Running a home is a very complicated and noble task. Your children will remember a happy and peaceful home. This does not mean men get a pass with household work and the discipleship and raising up of children. On the contrary, it means a godly man is helped by a godly wife as she “looks well to the ways of her household” (Proverbs 31) and the family succeeds as both husband and wife work as a team subduing everything under their responsibility. The man provides leadership, service, and will lay down his life at all times in all situations for the good of his family, whether that means doing dishes or working overtime to pay bills. It is a myth that a woman or man “can do it all!” As the leader of your household, men, you have to figure out, along with your wife, how to make God’s priorities the priorities of your home. But you, sir, are the one ultimately accountable to God for the care of your family.
Next thing I would say is prioritize spiritual things with your words and actions with the foremost things being God’s Word and the Church. So much more is caught than taught. Children will watch you live your life. They will hear what you say, but so much more valuable is your life lived in front of them. The way you prioritize God’s Word and God’s Church will forge a mark on them that they won’t soon forget. When they see you say no to lesser things in order to spend time in God’s Word and with God’s people, that’s what they will naturally know is most important in life. Commit to have them in Church on Sunday. This sounds easy but you have an enemy that will make it hard. Activities will always be screaming and vying for attention. Say no. Prioritize Sunday morning church attendance. Prioritize youth group. Show them that the Body of Christ is where they live, laugh, and cry. They will thank you for the rest of their lives. Having said that, only God can save your child. You are stacking the deck and asking Him to do that. Pray for your children daily. Never give up on them. Ever.
One more thing and I’ll wrap up. Be all in with them. Work at getting to know each of your children as an individual. How can you help them flourish? How are they unique? What gifts has God given them? Do whatever you can to walk with them so that they can excel in the areas God has gifted them in. Know them intimately. The Bible says they are your arrows. A warrior spent a lot of time crafting each arrow so that it was ready to go. Take time with your arrows. Each child is a masterpiece of God, made in the image of God. Each one needs your thoughtful attention as to what will help them be all that God has made them to be.
Resources we would highly recommend in your pursuit of a godly family:
Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
A Man After God's Own Heart by Jim George
A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George
T4T,
Pastor Ben